Children need discipline,
including babies and toddlers. Discipline is a process of teaching your baby to
be an independent being through self-control and self-regulation by
establishing certain boundaries and reinforcing them so that he has a mental
pattern of what he should or shouldn’t do.
Studies have shown that the way
parents handle discipline can affect positively or negatively the IQ of their
children. Children growing up in a hostile and restrictive home tend to have a
lower IQ than those who come from a loving and democratic one. Drawing the fine
line may not be easy, but it is not impossible.
Do establish
discipline based on your beliefs and values.
Do explain the
rules, and why those rules are there. Do make sure your child understands them.
Do make your
instructions clear and authoritative. Don’t put them in the form of a request,
such as “Can you, please, stop that?”
Don’t give out
too many rules at one time. Saying “No” is ineffective; your baby might even
think that his name is “No.”
Do be firm. A
loud “No!” or “Don’t do that!” is okay with a toddler or child; for a baby, use
sign language.
Don’t spank
your toddler. Why not? It only shows you’ve lost control yourself, and you’re
also showing your child that it’s okay to use force to dominate others. Don’t
let your child model your improper conduct.
Don’t inflict
any physical punishment. Don’t shake your baby or toddler. There are many
instances of death resulting from shaking babies and toddlers. Shaken babies
may experience brain damage, resulting in mental retardation and even
blindness.
Do be
consistent with your reaction to certain unwanted behavior. Any inconsistent
discipline only confuses your child.
Do discipline
immediately, and not after the fact.
Do give your
child a good reason to obey, such as “Go to bed now, and I’ll tell you a
story.” But don’t make it bribery.
Do show yourself
as a loving and affirming parent. Do offer reassurance to your child that you
still love him even though his behavior may be unacceptable, requiring
discipline.
Discipline plays a pivotal role in
the emotional and intellectual development of your baby, toddler, and child.
Remember this: babies are egocentric, and they think the world revolves around
them. Introduce discipline at around nine months of age, and not before that.
Stephen Lau
Copyright© by Stephen
Lau
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