Controlling the Uncontrollable

CONTROL AND OVER-DOING

Controlling external events is futility because control is but an illusion based on expected results projected by the thinking mind into the future. Concentration on controlling makes it difficult to concentrate on doing the right things to make you live longer.

The TAO, which is the wisdom of Lao Tzu, the ancient sage from China, looks upon the world as something to be accepted, and that involves invoking the profound but paradoxical wisdom of “action through inaction”—which is action based on acceptance of nature or the natural turn of events in life.

“Whenever we try to control,

we separate ourselves from our true nature.

Man proposes; the Creator disposes.

Life is sacred: it flows exactly as it should.

Trusting in the Creator, we return to our breathing,

natural and spontaneous, without conscious control.

In the same manner:

sometimes we have more,

sometimes we have less;

sometimes we exert ourselves,

sometimes we pull back;

sometimes we succeed,

sometimes we fail.

Trusting in the Creator, we see the comings and goings of things,

but without straining and striving to control them.”

(Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching, chapter 29)

According to the TAO, everything in life must follow a natural cycle, whether we like it or not, and that we must be patient because nothing is within our control, especially our destinies.

”That which shrinks
must first expand.
That which fails,
must first be strong.
That which is cast down
must first be raised.
Before receiving, there must be giving.
This is called perception of the nature of things.
Soft and weak overcome hard and strong.”
(Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching, chapter 36)

Spontaneity is the essence of the natural cycle. What goes up must eventually come down; life begets death; day is followed by night—just like the cycle of the four seasons.

"Allowing things to come and go,

following their natural laws,

we gain everything.

Straining and striving,

we lose everything."

(Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching, chapter 48)

Intuition of spontaneity is an understanding of the impermanence of all things: nothing lasts no matter how we strive to keep the impermanent permanent, and everything remains only with that very present moment.

"Strong winds come and go.

So do torrential rains.

Even heaven and earth cannot make them last forever."

(Lao Tzu, Tao Te  Ching, chapter 23)

The bottom line: do what needs to be done, but without over-doing, which causes stress in everyday life and living.

THE TAO OF LIVING LONGER

THE COMPLETE TAO TE CHING IN PLAIN ENGLISH

Stephen Lau                             

Copyright© by Stephen Lau

Teach Your Smart Baby to Count

Counting

Teach your smart baby the mathematic concept of numbers, even long before he can speak.

Show your baby your one finger, and say: “ONE.” Then show him your two fingers and say “TWO.” If your baby begins to show his interest in language, he will look at your mouth and watch how you articulate clearly and slowly those words. Repeat the process with two similar objects, such as two balls, saying “ONE” and “TWO.” At first, you baby may think that the sounds of the two words refer to the balls and the fingers. But, as soon as he knows what “balls” and “fingers” are, he will then perceive the abstract concept of numbers. Then proceed to counting other numbers, and play some simple board games, during which he learns to read the numbers on the dice as he moves his playing piece over the board.

The bottom line: expose your baby to the mathematic concept, and let him relate or understand the concept when he is mentally ready. Recognition of objects is the first step, and understanding the mathematic concept of numbers will follow suit.

To illustrate, “Chaser” is the name of the dog belonging to a retired psychologist John Pilley, who has successfully trained his dog to recognize over one thousand toys or items by their name and retrieve them at his command. It was shown on TV that Chaser has the largest tested memory of any non-human animal. If a dog can do it, a smart baby may have the super memory to remember everything. All he needs to do is to harness his mental skills to put everything in the right order through mental perception, and then relate them to some abstract concepts he has experienced or has been exposed to—this mental visualization and subsequent profound understanding is a testament to his intelligence.

My Reflection

When my daughter was only eight months old, I began to teach her how to read. One of the early stages to master reading skills is the recognition of words in relation to objects. That was how I started the teaching: as I was carrying her in my arms, I pointed to a TV set, and said: “TEE-VEE” She looked at how I slowly articulated the word, while pointing to the TV. I repeated the process every day. Before long, when I uttered the word “TEE-VEE,” she immediately turned her head to the direction of the TV without my pointing at it. If I could do it, you can do it too.

Math and science are interesting and fun if you allow your baby to experience the natural world firsthand. Don’t feel you must teach your baby specific facts and scientific principles; instead, let him explore and experience everything firsthand. Do teach him the specific skills of awareness and asking questions. Let your baby discover the answers through his own experience.

Stephen Lau  

Copyright© by Stephen Lau